Bless the Lord, O my soul…Who satisfies your mouth, your necessity and desire at your personal age and situation with good so that your youth renewed is like the Eagles, strong, overcoming, soaring. (Psalm 103:1-5 AMPC)
I’ve been dealing with a bad attitude lately. Yes, around here we call it the stinky britches attitude. One where I started slipping into discontentment because I thought I wasn’t getting enough alone / me / my interests time. The truth is my husband was giving me plenty of time to write, read and do other things.
Are you ready for this? I thought…
“Man! If the kids weren’t around ALL the time, I might get to some of these projects I’ve really wanted to do! I mean, I’ve got all these other things that bring me such fulfillment and I can’t get to any of them! Waaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaaah! I don’t get to work out anymore, I don’t get to read anymore, I don’t get to take care of my appearance as much as I’d like, I don’t get to go shopping or to the coffee shop as much I’d like, waaaaaaah, waaaaaaaah!
All I do is cook, clean, do laundry, homeschool, settle toy disputes, wipe noses, potty train, pick up stuff and clothes, clean up messes, and longingly look at my office door, crochet bag, sewing machine, herbal mixes to make salves with, tennis shoes and piano but just have to keep walking… Waaaaaah!
If only the kids didn’t fight as much.
If only my husband was home for dinners.
If only I lived in my own house.
If only I had more money, because then I could join the gym again.
If only I had more time.
Have you ever had a pity party like mine? It was huge, I mean, I even hired a band, had a dance floor and invited everyone around me to join in!
Ahh, It’s funny how what goes on in your head is only partial reality. It’s really how we’re choosing to perceive life. Like my husband repeatedly tells me when I get into this mode “stop this train before you crash!” Thank God for a good husband who knows me well enough to know what’s going on!
He’s right! I choose the tracks I put my mind on, and sometimes I even make up the tracks because they didn’t exist!
Here’s the reality of my life:
We’ve chosen to homeschool our children for too many amazing reasons to name here, at least now.
We’ve chosen to live with my mother-in-law for the time being because we all have a greater goal in mind, and it will take us working together to get there!
We’ve chosen for Brad to work evenings, for now, because we refuse to go into debt! He gets to eat a big breakfast with us every morning and we do our Family worship then.
We’ve chosen to live frugally because we have a greater goal in mind! You should see my cell phone… Like the main character in War Room said “I don’t have a smart phone, mine must be a dumb phone!!” And ohhhh have I gotten looks and comments!
And my kids? Well, they’re kids, learning the lifelong skill of good relational dynamics. And they are getting better!
As for more time… That’s hogwash. If I had all the time in the world I’d just look for more projects to fill it with. It’s how I’m wired. I’m a doer. I’m task oriented. Sitting still is a bit of torture for me. I’ll sit, alright! But my mind is still going and creating an infinite array of things!
So let me turn my ashes and sackcloth into your dancing! Think on these:
- Recognize your season in life isn’t permanent. So unless you run an orphanage in your house, you will not be in perpetual baby-toddler-children or teenager mode. This will pass, and very quickly! So live the season you’re in with gusto! Embrace it!
- Contentment is a virtue and must be practiced. Recognizing God has already given you everything you need to be happy is essential to your finding joy in motherhood and your effectiveness.
- Prioritize. We all have to learn to disappoint the right people. And that is answered this way: think of your life in rings. God is at the center, Your family is the inner ring, then work, then pleasure. I disappoint people out there often because it’s best for my family to have me. I’ll disappoint the kids if my husband and I need time together. You get the idea.
- Put God’s value on people and things.
See, God would absolutely be tickled if I wrote a new song that blessed my family and church next week. But not at the expense of my relationship with my kids. It’s my creative outlet, and it’s so nice to start something and finish it. Really! That sense of accomplishment is phenomenal! Raising a family doesn’t really have an end date; it’s hard to quantify how much work is enough in this arena.
So… I’ve redefined what a win looks like to me at the end of the day. Did I laugh with my kids? Did I have a moment with each one of them where I got to speak life, praise, encouragement into their hearts? Did I see my work around the house as a service of love for them, or as drudgery? Did I stay true to my convictions and standards throughout the day as I brought them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord? Do I really have no greater joy than to see my children walking in the truth? If so, today was a roaring success… Even if I didn’t get “a lot done”.
When I start to listen to social pressure, I’ll loose sight of these things. How do I get my perspective back? I read psalm 103 in the Amplified (Classic Edition).
How about you?What do you find helps you adjust your perspective? You can leave a comment by clicking here.